Wowee its been months!

So things haven't changed a ton since I last posted other than I'm more aware of how much I'm drinking and I'm doing alot better with that.  I'm replacing alot more wine with water these days  :)

I guess the true test that things are going well and uneventful is that I didn't even post when I hit my 2 year anniversary!  I am still maintaining, still dreaming of body reconstruction, and lastly still critical of my body.

This surgery will not change your perception of your body no matter how much you think it will.  Sure, you might not see the same number on the scale as you did months/years post-WLS but you WILL still see the same thing in the mirror.  Make no mistake about that.  You will go from seeing fat, to seeing the skin left over from your fat.  It affects your body image.  It affects your size in clothing.  It affects what you *think* you can do because you feel as big as you did pre-op.

I really want any pre/newly post/post WLS patients to read over and over that paragraph above.  You may think "it won't happen to me!"  I guarantee, it will.  Maybe not in the first year when you only have wins but outside that... when you stop losing and move to maintenance... be aware this WILL happen at some point!  I didn't think so myself, but it did as did many others.

Over 2 years out from my sleeve... I still do not drink any carbonation and I still try to keep protein as my first choice.  I don't always make the best choices but I do enough of the time to continue to maintain my weight loss.

Alcohol

So ... things from 2012 have not resolved.  I'm a teensy bit embarrassed by what I'm doing and allowing but, not enough to make any changes because frankly we're both enabling each other and understand that its what we need right now to cope...

For Hubby: smoking.
For Me: wine.

Hubby smokes ALOT.  I have wine ALOT. We both hate each other's addictions but can't stop each other from doing what we're addicted to. :(

I have 2-5 glasses a night depending on the night.  I like the taste so much that suddenly I get to the point where I realize that I've had too much.

The last couple of weeks I've had enough (likely too much) and found myself wondering what happened the night before.  I've been having a few conversations lately where I do not remember what I said or what happened.  Unfortunately my dumbass hubby chooses to make fun of me when I don't remember instead of talking to me honestly or with concern. Turns out we've had alot of very good conversations that I do not remember at all... literally.  Apparently last night, we talked about not only an automatic reload of my starbucks account but also having my plastics early Nov.  I remember none of it.

It makes me a little scared to be honest.  That I am THAT affected by the few glasses of wine that I remember nothing scares me... My mom DIED at 39 as an alcoholic (I'm 36)... that behaviour scares me. Have I graduated to blacking out when I drink?


*cry*

Before and after WLS

Just wanted to post a piccie :)

Before taken on surgery day April 27, 2011
After(current) taken at my Christmas party Dec 15, 2012

Why no liquids within an hr of eating?

Think of your stomach like the drain in your sink.
If you drink water, it goes through fast and quick.
If you eat food it sits (which is what makes you feel full) until it digests... slowly.
If you drink WHILE (or while there is/or shortly thereafter WILL be) you eat, it flushes the food that is making you feel full through your system quickly so you don't feel satiety as long.
This does 2 things... it empties your stomach making that feeling of fullness not last as long AND it pushes the food through your entire system too fast which means you don't get the nutrients you need from the food you just ate.



And, if you don't believe ME... watch it with him!

I think everyone. I mean EVERYONE... pre/non/post sleeve should really adopt this practise of not eating while/before/during eating.  It helps us not eat as much... which of course is what food establishments WANT us to do!

Plastics... first consult

My first Plastics consult aka reconstructive surgery (even the doc called it that.. it's not considered cosmetic!) ... local surgeon.

First the burning questions... 
What would the doctor recommend, the plusses of using him and lastly I'll discuss the cost.

He recommended the following procedures for me:

• Full abdominoplasty (Tummy Tuck aka TT) which would include lipo, muscle repair, relocating the belly button as well as lipo in the mons which is the pubic area that tends to become rather pronounced ... like a little hill... post TT so they'd flatten it out some by removing some fat.
• Breast Lift (Mastopexy) which would include implants (260cc) which post op would make me a solid full C cup. Not a deflated ...anywhere from B to D cup depending on the bra.
• BodyTite Liposuction on my flanks. In lieu of a lower body lift which I frankly do not need, he suggested more what I could use is some lipo with laser tightening in my lower saddlebags/hips/back to smooth, tighten and shape that area. 

BodyTite on YouTube  

Plusses of using this doctor include...

1. It's LOCAL, literally blocks from my home, in case something should be an issue. There's no flying anywhere to have this done in another city or country and then having to fly home and deal with post-op complications and care with local docs.
2. He provides a pain pump. Sweet. Most surgeons I've looked at so far don't.
3. NO drains. He doesn't use them because the pain pump would be made ineffective with them... and better, he hasn't needed them
4. He suggests I would likely be back at work within the month at the latest... not up to 12 weeks like some people have had
5. The actual surgery time is under 5 hours. He doesn't like having surgeries for longer than that as it starts to increase complication rates.
6. He provides all the post-op dressings, post op care, touch ups within the first year

The costs... (all inclusive) 

Abdominoplasty $10,065.44
BodyTite Lipo $5084.80
Bilateral Breast Lift $7,095.20

Total for all 3 = $22,245.44 CDN



We can't afford that. I can't ask hubby to put that kind of money into something as selfish as this. My WLS was one thing... and besides, it was only $5k plus travel costs... AND I was able to recover 1/2 of it since it was out of country medical.... this is over 4x that, completely unrecoverable. I'm sad. Hubby is not against it and would let me do it because he knows it's what I want but, the guilt...

ZEE heart... it burns!!!

I've been having alot of heartburn lately and I haven't been able to pin down what's doing it just yet.

Examples...
Tonight I had 1 slice of cheddar cheese (old) and 3 medium sized shrimps with cocktail sauce for dinner.   Heartburn.
Earlier today, I had 2 tablespoons of tuna salad (made at home just with miracle whip and pepper) on plain saltines for lunch.  Heartburn.
Last night, I had 1 vietnamese spring roll for dinner.   Heartburn.

Not sure what the common denominator is just yet.  Anyone with suggestions, please, chime in.

I do not take ANYTHING for acid up to this point.  This is new-ish... probably last month or 2.

Extra skin

Saw a new doc this week that will be our new family doctor here.  He was a sweet old guy, very kind and soft spoken.  He seemed genuinely concerned about why I had WLS and asked me about skin folds.  I think this is a great thing.  He documented my folds and mentioned skin removal... I said yes i wanted it. From what I've heard, if its documented well enough, they will cover it on the BC health plan.  Fingers crossed.

For reference... this is what 15 yrs of yo yo dieting from 250-130 lbs does to my body for extra skin.  I have a push up bra on so you can't see the carnage up top unfortunately but after that appt, I thought I should document this somewhere.  This is why there will not be a midriff baring ANYTHING on me until this is dealt with.

:(