ONEderland!!!!

This morning the scale said 199.5!!  YEAH!!!!!!  I really focused on my water yesterday and I think that helped.  I haven't gone to the bathroom in a few days though too so I suspect when that happens I'll even be lower yet.

Yayayayayayayayayyay!!

Well the scale dropped back down that 1/2 pound I was lamenting about but I do think it was just water retention from the beef jerky however its nice to see it back to no gain.

I seem to be able to get my water in the last couple days much much better.  I'm not able to GULP but I'm still able to drink a fair bit at once.  It's a weird feeling though because I can't drink very much still because my lil sleevie fills up so fast and then I feel all sloshy.  Every time I drink a fair bit I have a fear that it will hurt and I'll start to puke so I drink and then wait with trepidation for the pain to start.  It doesn't seem to be happening anymore which is awesome.  I still get that food stuck feeling when I eat something and swallow too much at a time but no longer with water.  Looks like my swelling is headed down! yay!

We went to Boston Pizza last night for dinner and I ordered the appy Thai Chicken Bites.  Had about 3 pcs of chicken and I was full.  I did pretty good.  I even was able to steal one of his nacho chips with beef and chew that to mush and eat it down without pain. The rest is leftovers for hubby today :)

We're going camping this weekend. Looking forward to the quiet and relaxation.  I asked hubby to get me shrimp and fruit (berries)... mmmm, I get to have shrimps and fruits now. yay!

stall-a-riffic

It appears I may have hit the dreaded 3rd week stall. 3 days now with no loss.  I'm actually UP 1/2 pound this morning.  The increase in the scale is probably due to the beef jerky that I had before bed last night.  I won't do that again.  It was way too salty.  I've been told to expect a stall any day now so I'm not surprised but I only wish that it had been kinder to me and let me get into the 100's before I stalled.  Instead I'm teetering on the edge of ONEderland and its so close I can touch it but can't quite grab it.

Frustrating.


Oh well.  I'll just keep plugging along!

3 wks post op

I don't really have much to say.  Scale is being a cow and hasn't moved in 2 days.  I suspect it will before the weekend.  Or, I could be up for the dreaded 3rd week stall.  Time will tell.  I'm still happy at how much I've lost thus far :)

Something I've observed about this journey is that I actually think about food MORE now than I did before.  In a different way though.  I think about what I'm going to be able to eat at each phase, if I'll be able to get down more than a couple spoonfuls this next time.  I think about being mindful of not drinking while eating.  And I think about drinking my water, ALL THE TIME.  I feel like I should have a camelback attached to me at work so I can get all the liquid in me that I need to each day.  I am wary to move onto full solids although as of today I can.  I've had a few things that I've chewed the crap out of and had it sit in my sleeve like a rock.  It's very painful and unfun.  I know that there's still swelling going down and it will improve over time, but of course, I'm impatient.

I tried the Chike brand of meal replacement today.  Meh.  It was ok. It is very flavourful, maybe TOO flavourful actually.  I had the orange cream one and it tasted kind of fake.  Took me all morning of sipping on it to get the whole thing down.

The easy way out??

I've heard others talk about how people in their lives have commented that this surgery is the "easy way out" because they didn't have to diet/exercise to lose the weight post-op.

That makes me mad. There's nothing easy about this surgery,  Since when is having most of a major organ completely removed from your body, irreversible surgery, easy?  This decision to take this step is a forever one.  There's no going back.  They can't put your stomach back.  Having surgery you have to deal with the mental part of what this does to you.  You have to deal with the anger at yourself, the disgust that you couldn't do it the "normal" way, that you've had to resort to these lengths just to lose weight and keep it off.  You have to deal with head hunger, negotiating using your new sleeve, pre-op and post-op liquid diets, being on baby food for weeks on end, having to take multi-vitamins, B12, for the rest of your life because your diet will no longer supply what your body needs due to the restriction. You have to deal with portion sizes for the rest of your life... only being able to eat a few spoonfuls of food for a month or longer.  Having a stomach that's only (as much as) 6oz for the rest of your life and learning how to eat all over again.

Then there's the surgery itself.  The pain from the gas they put in your belly to allow them to see while they work.  The tests.  The IV fluids and nothing by mouth for a day.  Having to negotiate a shower with 5 incisions in your stomach and a drain hanging out of you. The pain from the drain hanging there.  The awful disgusting vile liquid they make you drink when you have your leak test.The bloating for days. The exhaustion for weeks.  The pain when you try and take the tiniest sip of water and realize you have to get 64oz in every day.  The fear over the choice you've made and wondering if you made a bad decision.

Lastly, you have to deal with other people's opinions of your own weight loss efforts.  It amazes me how people seem to feel they have the right to have any involvement in what your diet should consist of or what you should be eating.  Even now, 3 weeks post op, I have people at work shaking their head at me asking if that's all I'm going to eat... (they don't know I had this surgery and they're not going to).  Some people admire the lengths you've chosen to be healthy, others simply say they couldn't do it, yet others have an opinion that you shouldn't have done it and then pull "facts" out of their ass about a person they know that had gastric bypass and had this or that happen.  Firstly, I didn't have gastric bypass... completely different surgery.  Secondly, my body. My choice.  Keep your opinions to yourself thankyouverymuch.

ok I think my rant is over ... for now :)

yummy yummers

I made dinner tonight for hubby and I had a few bites for dinner too.  I made whole wheat pasta with tuna and Parmesan cheese in it.  It was fantastic.  Hubby INHALED it and kept MMMMMMing.  I got about 3 spoonfuls before the pain started and I had to burp.  I think burping is my full signal. I chew everything to mush and swallow little bits at a time but I still get gassy.  I'm not swallowing air so I guess I'll go with the full signal.

Damn water... did it again tonight.  I had my first episode of vomiting since surgery.  Well it wasn't much vomiting, just water and the "slimys" people talk about.  I had a sharp pain in my chest like food stuck and it wouldn't clear.  I couldn't burp and it hurt alot.  Then my saliva went into overdrive and I just had to keep spitting.  Eventually it cleared and I was able to burp, made a huge difference.

I sure miss drinking water like I used to.

A PSA for fellow sleevers:

 As much as you might think you can drink like you used to, DON'T DO IT. 

I miss chugging water.  I actually LIKE water and pre-op would drink around 3 Litres a day. Sometimes I forget that I can't anymore.  Until I do it.  And then.  Ow.

Onederland is sooo close!

201 lbs today. 

I am so excited to make it back into the 100's again, I should see it in the next few days.

eeeeee!!