Body Image... and Plastics?

Why is it that when I was 100 lbs heavier I actually was LESS self conscious of my body? Is it some kind of body dysmorphia, was I actually more confident or was it all a facade to keep myself in a bubble of denial?

When I was heavier I had no problem prancing around nekkid in the house. I didn't even care if I passed in front of an open window. I felt comfortable in my skin (I thought so anyway) and I felt like a sexy beast.

Now I want to turn the lights off. I feel like I have little grandma boobages (I went from 38E to 34D) and the amount of wrinkly ass extra skin on my tummy makes me want to hide my body. All I can focus on was how badly I want to get plastics and how to best hold my body so I and my hubby can't see the yucky skin.

When I was bigger I remember saying to myself and others... he's is just happy you're naked, he's not judging your body, you are! And now, pot meet kettle. I can't even listen to my own damn advice.

Do any of my dear readers have these body image issues with yo yo dieting? How can you get past them? I get it .. love yourself, that's a no brainer. Is there anything else you can do though??

Weight updates

Today I'm at 133 lbs.  I'm not trying to lose any more weight.  It's still coming off too easily for my liking.  I've added Pro Performance Mass I.V. instead of the lower calorie one (1/2 serving) to get more calories in.  I am striving to get in 1200-1500 calories a day now that I've finally gone back to the gym.  I've been twice now with the new trainer.  I hurt.  lol.

http://www.gnc.com/product/index.jsp?productId=12409762"]http://www.gnc.com/product/index.jsp?productId=12409762   With 980 calories, 60 grams of protein (from 8 different sources!) and only 10 grams of sugar, Mass I.V. gives you more of what you want and less of what you don’t.


I hope it gives me the energy, calories and protein I need to build some muscle and stop losing weight!